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Monday, December 1, 2008

THE BON TEMPS BUGLE


BON TEMP BUGLE
Saturday, November 23, 2008


LOCAL BUSINESSMEN TAKE TOP HONORS

By Roving Reporter ABNegative

Sam Merlotte, local businessman and owner of Merlotte's Bar & Grill on Hummingbird Trail, just north of the Parish Road, has recently taken top honors at the Eukanuba Dog Championship held this past week in Philadelphia PA. "Dean" was named BEST IN SHOW. Mr. Merlotte's trainer and handler, Terry Bellafleur, said he was extremely proud of the showing that "Dean" made at the championship. "We were up against some very tough competition and we really weren't expecting to win this cup. He went on to say that he was grateful to Sam Merlotte - who is Mr. Bellafleur's employer - for allowing him the opportunity to work with and train Dean. "I didn't know how much time we would have since I have had to spend several months in Bon Temps Nervous Hospital and it was hard for both Sam and I to be absent from the bar at the same time, but Dean was very committed to winning" Several of the employees and patrons of Merlotte's Bar and Grill were asked what they thought about this honor. Layfayette Reynolds, short order cook, said "Hallalujes!, Hallalujes!!" . Sookie Stackhouse, waitress, said "Great, that's just great. But I don't see why you aren't thinking about ME and trying to find out who's out there still trying to KILL ME!" Bill Compton, former customer, said" I"m delighted for Tery Bellafleur, since as you know, we are brothers-in-arms and he has been very gracious to our people. But Sam and I have had a difficult relationship for years. Besides, he provokes me!" We also spoke with Tara Thornton, bartender and rumoured to be a romantic interest of Mr. Merlotte. Her response was "A dog! Sam's a dog! Well of all the stupid, dumbass, mo**erf**king shit! And he had the nerve to tell me I grunted like somekind of godd*m farm animal? Shit!"


Mr. Bellafleur, as you remember, recently gained national fame and attention himself when his exclusive line of jewelery made from two pronged possum pecker dick bone, was featured on QVC. He has also been invited to be the Grand Marshall for the annual Possum Poke Festival held in lovely downtown TY Ty , GA. Ty Ty is nationally known as the home of the Hiney Wineries. "There's Nothing So Bad A Little Hiney Can't Fix".

The Bon Temp Bugle proudly blows it's horn for our own! Salute!

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